In the reading of one of my old journal entries I noticed two things. One of my tendencies at that time was to concentrate on failure. Another was that I was practicing piano.
My negative tendency then was to concentrate on what I did not do or what I did not do well. I would think about what I could have been and about what I am not. The effect was to make me not want to do anything at all; it made me want to give it all up. All this holding on to things perceived as failures or as incomplete were very sapping to my strength.
Yet in that same entry I recorded how I was becoming fairly good at elementary piano playing. I have no memory of ever being good at piano, but the Journal says I was. The only way I could have accomplished this was through persistent practice. Many times I did it only because I thought it might be something I wanted. Many times I wondered if this was a thing I could ever do - - or whether it would ever be worth the effort. But I knew I could never achieve anything id I did not take the little steps.
It's like drops in a bucket. If there are no drips the bucket will never become full. Want to be good at piano? Do the practice: drip, drip, drip. Want to get depressed? Think bad thoughts: drip, drip, drip.
So I need to press on through the failure. I need to turn my mind from failure to a worthy goal, whatever it may be. I need to overcome, overcome, overcome. Overcoming may not look pretty and glamorous; it does not even feel virtuous or victorious at the time you are doing it. The unimportant appearance of an overcoming task is a deception. We want the bucket filled with one sweeping, dramatic, Hollywood slosh whereas it is filled only one drop at at time. No drops, no filling. There will never come the Hollywood slosh.
