Jesus was amid a turmoil when he was with us 2000 years ago. Some believed him and some did not. Many may have contended, “The Messiah is supposed to come from Bethlehem but this guy comes from Nazareth. This guy has never even been to seminary.” Perhaps these did not know that Jesus was actually born in Bethlehem. They certainly did not know he was God incarnate, one with the Father and Holy Spirit. The Pharisees wanted the people to believe as they believed and they used themselves as the example and reason: “Have any of us (the Pharisees) believed on him? We have all gone to seminary and are smart and understand what those who have not gone to seminary can understand. To know if you are correct in your thinking look at what the seminary graduates are thinking. But you people who do not have the training are cursed.”
We have doubts about things because we do not know all there is to know. Jesus appeared as if was not obeying the Law because of work he did on the Sabbath, yet he did a right thing when he healed a man on the Sabbath. It was right to do because God's intention for us is for wholeness. Many were seeking his harm: the religious leaders and even his brothers (the other sons of Mary).
Why would he choose to place himself in such a setting? Why not just come in lightning and power and destroy all who oppose him and whip the rest into submission? Because if he came that way most being sinners would die immediately, many others would die in a short while later, many would be miserable suffering stripes on their back. Only a few would be somewhat content, though walking on eggshells.
What did God want? His will was to demonstrate mercy. His will was that all should not perish, but should come to the knowledge of the truth. He came not to give stripes - - but by his stripes we should be healed.
This is an example of Gods great love and loving kindness - - by not sending lightning.
Thursday, December 31, 2015
Wednesday, December 30, 2015
DON'T AVOID THE DRIPS
In the reading of one of my old journal entries I noticed two things. One of my tendencies at that time was to concentrate on failure. Another was that I was practicing piano.
My negative tendency then was to concentrate on what I did not do or what I did not do well. I would think about what I could have been and about what I am not. The effect was to make me not want to do anything at all; it made me want to give it all up. All this holding on to things perceived as failures or as incomplete were very sapping to my strength.
Yet in that same entry I recorded how I was becoming fairly good at elementary piano playing. I have no memory of ever being good at piano, but the Journal says I was. The only way I could have accomplished this was through persistent practice. Many times I did it only because I thought it might be something I wanted. Many times I wondered if this was a thing I could ever do - - or whether it would ever be worth the effort. But I knew I could never achieve anything id I did not take the little steps.
It's like drops in a bucket. If there are no drips the bucket will never become full. Want to be good at piano? Do the practice: drip, drip, drip. Want to get depressed? Think bad thoughts: drip, drip, drip.
So I need to press on through the failure. I need to turn my mind from failure to a worthy goal, whatever it may be. I need to overcome, overcome, overcome. Overcoming may not look pretty and glamorous; it does not even feel virtuous or victorious at the time you are doing it. The unimportant appearance of an overcoming task is a deception. We want the bucket filled with one sweeping, dramatic, Hollywood slosh whereas it is filled only one drop at at time. No drops, no filling. There will never come the Hollywood slosh.
My negative tendency then was to concentrate on what I did not do or what I did not do well. I would think about what I could have been and about what I am not. The effect was to make me not want to do anything at all; it made me want to give it all up. All this holding on to things perceived as failures or as incomplete were very sapping to my strength.
Yet in that same entry I recorded how I was becoming fairly good at elementary piano playing. I have no memory of ever being good at piano, but the Journal says I was. The only way I could have accomplished this was through persistent practice. Many times I did it only because I thought it might be something I wanted. Many times I wondered if this was a thing I could ever do - - or whether it would ever be worth the effort. But I knew I could never achieve anything id I did not take the little steps.
It's like drops in a bucket. If there are no drips the bucket will never become full. Want to be good at piano? Do the practice: drip, drip, drip. Want to get depressed? Think bad thoughts: drip, drip, drip.
So I need to press on through the failure. I need to turn my mind from failure to a worthy goal, whatever it may be. I need to overcome, overcome, overcome. Overcoming may not look pretty and glamorous; it does not even feel virtuous or victorious at the time you are doing it. The unimportant appearance of an overcoming task is a deception. We want the bucket filled with one sweeping, dramatic, Hollywood slosh whereas it is filled only one drop at at time. No drops, no filling. There will never come the Hollywood slosh.
Saturday, December 26, 2015
CHRISTMAS CONSPIRACY
"Blessed is the season which engages the whole world in a conspiracy of love." This was a quote from an automatic email I get. It is supposed to refer to Christmas. Odd that it does not mention Christ. When I think of “conspiracy” I think of evil people colluding together to do bad things. Good people “cooperate”, Bad people “conspire”. In fact the dictionary says conspiracy is, “An agreement to perform together an illegal, wrongful or subversive act.”
It seems Christmas has changed from a religious holiday to a time of obligations for many and a time of financial opportunity for others.
It seems Christmas has changed from a religious holiday to a time of obligations for many and a time of financial opportunity for others.
Friday, December 25, 2015
WHEN STARVING PREFER TO STARVE
“The lips of the righteous feed many, but fools die for want of wisdom.” (Proverbs 10:21) What he says goes out and “feeds” the ears of many. The words are feeding the ears of people who are listening. The words feed because they are helpful, hopeful, beneficial words the listeners can use in their lives. The ears gobble them up and send them to the brain, intellect, spirit, emotions to be digested and used in life.
But there are some, the fools, that will not hear. This is a choice; the words are spoken but they choose to reject, not to hear, them. Perhaps these words conflict with how they intend to live their life. Perhaps they will effect their money or status. Perhaps they would have to change their direction.
But there are some, the fools, that will not hear. This is a choice; the words are spoken but they choose to reject, not to hear, them. Perhaps these words conflict with how they intend to live their life. Perhaps they will effect their money or status. Perhaps they would have to change their direction.
Sunday, December 20, 2015
MEEK VS WEAK
Some people use the word “meek” when they really mean “weak”. They turn the first letter of the word upside down. I wish they would not do that. If they mean to refer to a person they consider “weak” they should say “weak”. Say what you mean!
A meek person is one who is not “froward”. A meek person shows patience and humility; he is gentle and considerate. He may be meek but that does not mean he is easily imposed on or submissive. One who is easily imposed on or submissive is called “weak”. Remember the old song lyric, “. . . gentile Jesus, meek and mild . . .” While Jesus might have been easy-going and kind to some, he was hardly a push-over!
If you mean to say a person is unassertive and retiring, say he is “weak”. Don't call him “meek”. Do not turn the first letter of the word upside down.
A “froward” person, by the way, is one who is stubbornly contrary and disobedient; he is obstinate.
A meek person is one who is not “froward”. A meek person shows patience and humility; he is gentle and considerate. He may be meek but that does not mean he is easily imposed on or submissive. One who is easily imposed on or submissive is called “weak”. Remember the old song lyric, “. . . gentile Jesus, meek and mild . . .” While Jesus might have been easy-going and kind to some, he was hardly a push-over!
If you mean to say a person is unassertive and retiring, say he is “weak”. Don't call him “meek”. Do not turn the first letter of the word upside down.
A “froward” person, by the way, is one who is stubbornly contrary and disobedient; he is obstinate.
Saturday, December 19, 2015
THE INSIDES MATCH PEOPLE
Proverbs 10:18 says that he who hides hatred with lying lips AND he that speaks slander is a fool. (emphasis mine)
The Hider is one that hates who or what he is talking about, but tells others something entirely different. The listener does not know where or how he really stands.
The Slanderer openly despises the thing or person he talks about, and everyone knows it.
Although apparently different, they are inwardly the same. The similarity between the two is in the heart, where there is hatred. They both seek to do damage. The hate and destruction makes them fools.
They are not god-like, filled with creation, love and true judgment.
The Hider is one that hates who or what he is talking about, but tells others something entirely different. The listener does not know where or how he really stands.
The Slanderer openly despises the thing or person he talks about, and everyone knows it.
Although apparently different, they are inwardly the same. The similarity between the two is in the heart, where there is hatred. They both seek to do damage. The hate and destruction makes them fools.
They are not god-like, filled with creation, love and true judgment.
Thursday, December 17, 2015
USE OF WEALTH
The wealth of the rich enables them to build strong defenses, which protect them and enable them to keep and acquire more wealth.
The poverty of the poor leaves them nothing with which to avoid or defend against destruction. This causes them to lose even more of what they already have, which makes them poorer.
The considerate and generous wealthy seek to share their excess in ways to save, secure, educate and uplift deserving poor people or the general public.
The prudent poor seek to understand their situation and to plan ways and means to exit poverty. They will solicit advice from the more fortunate. They will use welfare to escape from the need of it and never to return to it.
The inconsiderate wealthy seek to keep all they have and to acquire even more. They may even try to usurp wealth they have no right to own by underhanded or illegal means.
The inconsiderate poor merely complain of their situation and take no thought of how to change. They may horde to themselves that which they could spare for the less fortunate.
The poverty of the poor leaves them nothing with which to avoid or defend against destruction. This causes them to lose even more of what they already have, which makes them poorer.
The considerate and generous wealthy seek to share their excess in ways to save, secure, educate and uplift deserving poor people or the general public.
The prudent poor seek to understand their situation and to plan ways and means to exit poverty. They will solicit advice from the more fortunate. They will use welfare to escape from the need of it and never to return to it.
The inconsiderate wealthy seek to keep all they have and to acquire even more. They may even try to usurp wealth they have no right to own by underhanded or illegal means.
The inconsiderate poor merely complain of their situation and take no thought of how to change. They may horde to themselves that which they could spare for the less fortunate.
Monday, December 14, 2015
TURNING
People have to make an effort to get knowledge and wisdom, and they have to make an effort not to. Know, perceive, receive, hear, attain, understand.
Regarding Proverbs 31: Wisdom calls out to the Simple and the Scorner, among others. If they were to turn she would pour out her spirit and make know her words. Because he will not put out the effort the Simple (and I am not talking of the mentally incompetent) is unaware of basic facts thus making himself incapable of more complex mental activities. The Scorner looks upon others as inferior to himself and is more than willing to say so.
If the Simple and the Scorner will turn (steer away from their usual way of doing things) Wisdom would make them capable of receiving wisdom. The spirit of wisdom will allow them to think the way the wise think. They will become enlightened to wise concepts. They will be able to see as they have never seen before, as when in a dark room the light has been turned on. What a wonderful thing: for the Simple to become smart and capable and for the Scorner to have a humble, hopeful view of things. But it takes the effect of turning.
Some people choose not to have wisdom for they hated knowledge of God and they did not choose the fear of the LORD. They would have none of wisdom's counsel. They despise all the reproofs. “. . . the turning away of the simple will slay them.” Those that choose prosperity over wisdom (and obedience and godliness) are choosing destruction.
It takes effort to be wise (and godly) and it takes effort not to be wise (and godly). If we are going to have effort, let us ave effort that profits to godliness. Let's make the right turns.
Regarding Proverbs 31: Wisdom calls out to the Simple and the Scorner, among others. If they were to turn she would pour out her spirit and make know her words. Because he will not put out the effort the Simple (and I am not talking of the mentally incompetent) is unaware of basic facts thus making himself incapable of more complex mental activities. The Scorner looks upon others as inferior to himself and is more than willing to say so.
If the Simple and the Scorner will turn (steer away from their usual way of doing things) Wisdom would make them capable of receiving wisdom. The spirit of wisdom will allow them to think the way the wise think. They will become enlightened to wise concepts. They will be able to see as they have never seen before, as when in a dark room the light has been turned on. What a wonderful thing: for the Simple to become smart and capable and for the Scorner to have a humble, hopeful view of things. But it takes the effect of turning.
Some people choose not to have wisdom for they hated knowledge of God and they did not choose the fear of the LORD. They would have none of wisdom's counsel. They despise all the reproofs. “. . . the turning away of the simple will slay them.” Those that choose prosperity over wisdom (and obedience and godliness) are choosing destruction.
It takes effort to be wise (and godly) and it takes effort not to be wise (and godly). If we are going to have effort, let us ave effort that profits to godliness. Let's make the right turns.
Saturday, December 12, 2015
TREATING WOMEN
In Proverbs 31 Wisdom is personified as a woman. We find this advice to a man from Wisdom: "Give not your strength to women, or your ways to that which destroys kings". It is interesting that a wisdom's advice to a man she cares for, one she wants to give the "inside track" to, is to avoid other women.
I wonder if women are different from mothers, sisters, wife, daughters ? He should not spend his money, time and influence for women that are not his family. Rather, of the woman he engages foremost, he should favor his mother, sister, wife, daughter.
The thrust of a man's life should not be women. I think it would not be even his wife. He should consider his purpose in life is to serve his God. In the service of his God he cares for and prefers his wife and raises and educates his children. In the exercise of serving his God, a man serves others, like wife and children.
When God is going over the books with you in heaven and you get to the "Treatment of Other People" section, the first major category will be "Family".
I wonder if women are different from mothers, sisters, wife, daughters ? He should not spend his money, time and influence for women that are not his family. Rather, of the woman he engages foremost, he should favor his mother, sister, wife, daughter.
The thrust of a man's life should not be women. I think it would not be even his wife. He should consider his purpose in life is to serve his God. In the service of his God he cares for and prefers his wife and raises and educates his children. In the exercise of serving his God, a man serves others, like wife and children.
When God is going over the books with you in heaven and you get to the "Treatment of Other People" section, the first major category will be "Family".
Friday, December 11, 2015
DOES MY ARM REALLY ITCH?
An amputee feels sensations of itching or pain from a limb (arm or leg) that is no longer there. There are no longer any physical sensors (nerves) to provide signals. No messages can travel from sensors that are not there. Where is the feeling coming from when there is no limb?
Yet the sense of itching or pain is still present in the victim; the victim knows, the victim can feel it. Where is the feeling when there is no limb?
Does it arise from an actual electrical-chemical-physical stimulus? What is its origin: The Spinal Chord, the brain's nerves? If it is, how can this process be identified, demonstrated and measured? Can it be controlled by drugs or surgery?
Does the feeling have an emotional, not-physical source? Is it a process of thought, of emotion? Can the victim control this process? What does the existence of this phenomenon say about spiritual reality? Where is the pain or itching really? Is it in the limb, the nerves, or in the brain?
When we, who have all our limbs, feel itching or pain where does it really exist: in the limb, the nerves, or in the brain?
Yet the sense of itching or pain is still present in the victim; the victim knows, the victim can feel it. Where is the feeling when there is no limb?
Does it arise from an actual electrical-chemical-physical stimulus? What is its origin: The Spinal Chord, the brain's nerves? If it is, how can this process be identified, demonstrated and measured? Can it be controlled by drugs or surgery?
Does the feeling have an emotional, not-physical source? Is it a process of thought, of emotion? Can the victim control this process? What does the existence of this phenomenon say about spiritual reality? Where is the pain or itching really? Is it in the limb, the nerves, or in the brain?
When we, who have all our limbs, feel itching or pain where does it really exist: in the limb, the nerves, or in the brain?
Thursday, December 10, 2015
VANTAGE POINTS
12 September 1994
A while ago I was flying in the plane on my way to the MACS (Marine Corps Air Station) at Tustin, California I looked down upon the earth from 35000 feet. Things of men were so small that only the largest of buildings were obvious. When looking at a super highway it would have been difficult to pick out a semi truck. Indeed, I never saw one. If a person, like say Jesus, was standing in the middle of an intersection you might know in your mind he was there but you could not possibly see him. Then let your eye wander over the rest of the earth that you could see. The smallness of that place where Jesus is becomes astounding.
Yet through such a means (a human body) God saved the world. Think of God living in one human body. Compare to John 1:14 . . . and the Word became flesh and dwelt among men . . .
The vantage point of the plane demonstrates the expansiveness of God's comprehension. He comprehends what the human eye in the plane sees . . . and every thing else.
A while ago I was flying in the plane on my way to the MACS (Marine Corps Air Station) at Tustin, California I looked down upon the earth from 35000 feet. Things of men were so small that only the largest of buildings were obvious. When looking at a super highway it would have been difficult to pick out a semi truck. Indeed, I never saw one. If a person, like say Jesus, was standing in the middle of an intersection you might know in your mind he was there but you could not possibly see him. Then let your eye wander over the rest of the earth that you could see. The smallness of that place where Jesus is becomes astounding.
Yet through such a means (a human body) God saved the world. Think of God living in one human body. Compare to John 1:14 . . . and the Word became flesh and dwelt among men . . .
The vantage point of the plane demonstrates the expansiveness of God's comprehension. He comprehends what the human eye in the plane sees . . . and every thing else.
Sunday, December 6, 2015
AUTOBIOGRAPHY POSTINGS
The following blogs, down to the one titled "Buster and The Toilet" (posted 11-16-2015), were taken from an autobiography I intended to write. Upon reflection I don't believe anyone except my immediate family would really be interested in an autobiography about me. So I put them here, which is as close as they ever will get to the public.
The only new post in this series from November 16 2015 to date is titled "Zacchaeus" (posted 11-22-2015).
The only new post in this series from November 16 2015 to date is titled "Zacchaeus" (posted 11-22-2015).
MAY 2012 MEMORY LOSS-6
MEMORY LOSS
[[This blog, and several following, have to do with memory loss events apparently due to "brain freezes". All took place before my one-and-only seizure. ]]
An entry in FaceBook that is not repeated here elsewhere:
"And it's even better than that. I seems Tamra had a graduation party on Saturday, and I was there. Well, my body was there. Maybe I drove off without my memory. I didn't make a fool of myself, did I? I have no inkling that anything is "slipping", as far as I know.
"How I know about the party came from a Facebook invitation to Tamra's party, dated last week. Well, the party may be gone, but Tamra is not. PapaJ loves you girl, and your sisters and Mom and Dad."
5/23/2012
[[This blog, and several following, have to do with memory loss events apparently due to "brain freezes". All took place before my one-and-only seizure. ]]
An entry in FaceBook that is not repeated here elsewhere:
"And it's even better than that. I seems Tamra had a graduation party on Saturday, and I was there. Well, my body was there. Maybe I drove off without my memory. I didn't make a fool of myself, did I? I have no inkling that anything is "slipping", as far as I know.
"How I know about the party came from a Facebook invitation to Tamra's party, dated last week. Well, the party may be gone, but Tamra is not. PapaJ loves you girl, and your sisters and Mom and Dad."
5/23/2012
Saturday, December 5, 2015
MAY 2012 MEMORY LOSS-5
MEMORY LOSS
[[This blog, and several following, have to do with memory loss events apparently due to "brain freezes". All took place before my one-and-only seizure. ]]
An email to Gordon Anderson: "Gorden, It turns out I could have made our coffee time tomorrow. My other appointment has been pushed off to another day (the 29th).
"I believe I have told you about my 'brain freezes', a peculiar feeling I have been getting for the last 4 to 6 months, about one set of episodes a month. I loose some memory when they happen.
"The following is how I described it on FaceBook: 'Ever loose almost a whole day? I went to church Sunday, sung in the choir, ate the picnic lunch . . . and I don't remember any of it. It's like it never happened! It's just not there in my memory. This sucks!
" 'But I'm not going to think of it as "gone". I'm going to think of it as there, but unattached. Somehow the path to that block of memory got broken. I'm going to believe that someday I will "find" the memories. I'm certainly not going to mope around, "Oh woe is me! woe is me!" I'm going to believe I'll get them back! Being negative and "down" will not help.
" 'Scary, and nothing to do about it. Later that day (Sunday) Lizzie tells me I had a hot dog while I was there. I remember eating a hot dog, but nothing else (yet). Where did it (the memory) go? What else is gone? How would I know what is gone? What can I do?
" 'I should struggle against it, yes, but to obsess would do more damage. The hot dog is my anchor for that day. I'm glad I have a more sure anchor within the veil . . . . '
" 'I don't remember anything about the Dream Builders Breakfast (you can see why). I don't believe I'll go. We can either keep the original time, 1100am, or make it a later time. You say when. (The original time was 1100am Thursdays, wasn't it? Do I have that right? -- I'm now gun shy about times.)' "
[[ Dec 5, 2015: Those memories still have not come back. I now believe they are forever gone.]]
5/23/2012
[[This blog, and several following, have to do with memory loss events apparently due to "brain freezes". All took place before my one-and-only seizure. ]]
An email to Gordon Anderson: "Gorden, It turns out I could have made our coffee time tomorrow. My other appointment has been pushed off to another day (the 29th).
"I believe I have told you about my 'brain freezes', a peculiar feeling I have been getting for the last 4 to 6 months, about one set of episodes a month. I loose some memory when they happen.
"The following is how I described it on FaceBook: 'Ever loose almost a whole day? I went to church Sunday, sung in the choir, ate the picnic lunch . . . and I don't remember any of it. It's like it never happened! It's just not there in my memory. This sucks!
" 'But I'm not going to think of it as "gone". I'm going to think of it as there, but unattached. Somehow the path to that block of memory got broken. I'm going to believe that someday I will "find" the memories. I'm certainly not going to mope around, "Oh woe is me! woe is me!" I'm going to believe I'll get them back! Being negative and "down" will not help.
" 'Scary, and nothing to do about it. Later that day (Sunday) Lizzie tells me I had a hot dog while I was there. I remember eating a hot dog, but nothing else (yet). Where did it (the memory) go? What else is gone? How would I know what is gone? What can I do?
" 'I should struggle against it, yes, but to obsess would do more damage. The hot dog is my anchor for that day. I'm glad I have a more sure anchor within the veil . . . . '
" 'I don't remember anything about the Dream Builders Breakfast (you can see why). I don't believe I'll go. We can either keep the original time, 1100am, or make it a later time. You say when. (The original time was 1100am Thursdays, wasn't it? Do I have that right? -- I'm now gun shy about times.)' "
[[ Dec 5, 2015: Those memories still have not come back. I now believe they are forever gone.]]
5/23/2012
MAY 2012 MEMORY LOSS-4
MEMORY LOSS
[[This blog, and several following, have to do with memory loss events apparently due to "brain freezes". All took place before my one-and-only seizure. ]]
Another email from Lizzie to the Kids: "Dearest Children: Dad is having some serious memory loss tonight. It began (as far as I know) at 8:30 pm this evening. He has had another at 11:30; not remembering what we did all evening. He is very sad; was sad at the afternoon picnic and it has continued. Please pray for him. I am not sure how long it will go on, (as is usual). I love him and we will seek the Lord in this."
5/20/2012
[[This blog, and several following, have to do with memory loss events apparently due to "brain freezes". All took place before my one-and-only seizure. ]]
Another email from Lizzie to the Kids: "Dearest Children: Dad is having some serious memory loss tonight. It began (as far as I know) at 8:30 pm this evening. He has had another at 11:30; not remembering what we did all evening. He is very sad; was sad at the afternoon picnic and it has continued. Please pray for him. I am not sure how long it will go on, (as is usual). I love him and we will seek the Lord in this."
5/20/2012
Friday, December 4, 2015
MAY 2012 MEMORY LOSS-3
MEMORY LOSS
[[This blog, and several following, have to do with memory loss events apparently due to "brain freezes". All took place before my one-and-only seizure. ]]
Another email from Lizzie to the children: "Dear Children; A small group which we have joined from Ascension anointed Dad with oil and prayed fervently for him; we are quieted and encouraged. Five phone calls were on the answering machine from when we got home. We have landed. I feel that we have been searching for this group of believers and found our place in the Body of Christ. It's hard to describe, but I feel good, welcome, accepted. Even with Eric's episodes, they seem to take it in stride and treat us like a loving family. Praise be to God.
"Eric's MRI is scheduled for early tomorrow. Though I don't know when we will have results, we will surely tell you as soon as we know.
"Coldwater Creek has asked me to stay as a permanent part time. They know about Eric's situation. Funny timing in my estimation for this opening to come along; Eric was so happy for me he teared up. I'll try for this as long as he is safe and OK here at home (or better yet, is out and about on his usual independent way). We love you so much; we can't tell you how grateful we are for your calls, advice and our sense of your being nearby."
5/21/2012
[[This blog, and several following, have to do with memory loss events apparently due to "brain freezes". All took place before my one-and-only seizure. ]]
Another email from Lizzie to the children: "Dear Children; A small group which we have joined from Ascension anointed Dad with oil and prayed fervently for him; we are quieted and encouraged. Five phone calls were on the answering machine from when we got home. We have landed. I feel that we have been searching for this group of believers and found our place in the Body of Christ. It's hard to describe, but I feel good, welcome, accepted. Even with Eric's episodes, they seem to take it in stride and treat us like a loving family. Praise be to God.
"Eric's MRI is scheduled for early tomorrow. Though I don't know when we will have results, we will surely tell you as soon as we know.
"Coldwater Creek has asked me to stay as a permanent part time. They know about Eric's situation. Funny timing in my estimation for this opening to come along; Eric was so happy for me he teared up. I'll try for this as long as he is safe and OK here at home (or better yet, is out and about on his usual independent way). We love you so much; we can't tell you how grateful we are for your calls, advice and our sense of your being nearby."
5/21/2012
MAY 2012 MEMORY LOSS-2
MEMORY LOSS
[[This blog, the one following, have to do with memory loss events apparently due to "brain freezes". All took place before my one-and-only seizure. ]]
This is what Lizzie wrote Bob Johnson: "Bob, Eric has had a serious memory loss episode. It began Sunday evening. Today, on Monday, when I returned from work it was severe. He has had episodes off and on for 3 or 4 years, but comes out of them after several hours and is back to normal. Doctors, after extensive testing, tell us there is no dementia or Alzheimer's. They are mystified. Eric would like to come as you requested, but he is concerned because the episode has never been this severe. He enjoys your music and leadership very much. Hopefully this hard time for him will pass."
5/21/2012
[[This blog, the one following, have to do with memory loss events apparently due to "brain freezes". All took place before my one-and-only seizure. ]]
This is what Lizzie wrote Bob Johnson: "Bob, Eric has had a serious memory loss episode. It began Sunday evening. Today, on Monday, when I returned from work it was severe. He has had episodes off and on for 3 or 4 years, but comes out of them after several hours and is back to normal. Doctors, after extensive testing, tell us there is no dementia or Alzheimer's. They are mystified. Eric would like to come as you requested, but he is concerned because the episode has never been this severe. He enjoys your music and leadership very much. Hopefully this hard time for him will pass."
5/21/2012
Thursday, December 3, 2015
MAY 2012 MEMORY LOSS-1
MEMORY LOSS
[[This blog, and several above this one, have to do with memory loss events apparently due to "brain freezes". All took place before my one-and-only seizure. ]]
This Is what Lizzy wrote to the kids toward the end of the memory loss episode:
"Dearest Children: Dad's memory loss is severe this time. I want you to know about him today so that you can advise me if you think of anything, and know of his welfare.
"The episodes began 8:30 pm Sunday, and they went on through the night. This morning we had coffee and devotions and he was aware and coherent. But when I got home from work at 4:15 today his memory loss was severe. Evidently he had slept on the couch the whole time I was gone from 10:40 am to 4:15 pm. He doesn't remember anything from yesterday: (it was a special day at church, etc., where we sang in the choir and a picnic after).
"So I need wisdom: not to be as a "mother" but to know what decisions (if I should make them) will be for his best. We have an appointment at his primary care doctor tomorrow AM.
"You all seem to have different and thoughtful advice when we ask. If you sense I should be doing or thinking in a way you think is good, please tell me."
5/21/2012
[[This blog, and several above this one, have to do with memory loss events apparently due to "brain freezes". All took place before my one-and-only seizure. ]]
This Is what Lizzy wrote to the kids toward the end of the memory loss episode:
"Dearest Children: Dad's memory loss is severe this time. I want you to know about him today so that you can advise me if you think of anything, and know of his welfare.
"The episodes began 8:30 pm Sunday, and they went on through the night. This morning we had coffee and devotions and he was aware and coherent. But when I got home from work at 4:15 today his memory loss was severe. Evidently he had slept on the couch the whole time I was gone from 10:40 am to 4:15 pm. He doesn't remember anything from yesterday: (it was a special day at church, etc., where we sang in the choir and a picnic after).
"So I need wisdom: not to be as a "mother" but to know what decisions (if I should make them) will be for his best. We have an appointment at his primary care doctor tomorrow AM.
"You all seem to have different and thoughtful advice when we ask. If you sense I should be doing or thinking in a way you think is good, please tell me."
5/21/2012
SELF PROCLAIMED TITLES
TBD
I was thinking about titles. There are a lot of titles we can apply to ourselves:
- Husband
- Father
- Grandfather
- Son
- Brother
- Uncle
- Taxpayer
- Civil Servent
- Military Man
- Radioman
- Student
- Logistics Manager
- Government Representative
- Education Specialist
- Customer
- Assistant to the Author
- Website Manager or Webmaster
- Blogger
-
6/7/2012
I was thinking about titles. There are a lot of titles we can apply to ourselves:
- Husband
- Father
- Grandfather
- Son
- Brother
- Uncle
- Taxpayer
- Civil Servent
- Military Man
- Radioman
- Student
- Logistics Manager
- Government Representative
- Education Specialist
- Customer
- Assistant to the Author
- Website Manager or Webmaster
- Blogger
-
6/7/2012
SOFTWARE WORK
LESSONS LEARNED
What need am I filling when I write VBA or transfer information from one file type to another file type? I Want:
-- to unlock the information.
-- to manipulate the information.
-- to make a tedious task easy
-- to discover something from the information that no one else has seen
-- or to get it before anyone else does.
-- to be a purveyor of information.
-- to be a source of correct information.
None of the above seems to be connected to the actual content of the information; I just want to get it, convert it, shape it, present it.
What need am I filling when I write VBA or transfer information from one file type to another file type? I Want:
-- to unlock the information.
-- to manipulate the information.
-- to make a tedious task easy
-- to discover something from the information that no one else has seen
-- or to get it before anyone else does.
-- to be a purveyor of information.
-- to be a source of correct information.
None of the above seems to be connected to the actual content of the information; I just want to get it, convert it, shape it, present it.
Wednesday, December 2, 2015
NEEDS
LESSONS LEARNED
What are my real needs?
-- Food, air, water, shelter
-- to be wanted.
-- to be respected.
-- to have a purpose.
And the following, which are the most important, but so often left off the list and out of the thinking:
-- to please God.
-- to hear God.
What are my real needs?
-- Food, air, water, shelter
-- to be wanted.
-- to be respected.
-- to have a purpose.
And the following, which are the most important, but so often left off the list and out of the thinking:
-- to please God.
-- to hear God.
Tuesday, December 1, 2015
WHO MAKES THE MONEY
LESSONS LEARNED
Once years ago, as I was having a severe fit of depression and self pity, I tried to identify why some people made lots of money:
-- They have a skill others want and not many have: Electricians, AC men, IT men, etc.
-- They have knowledge or special education not many have: Doctors , Lawyers, etc.
-- They are entrepreneurs that employ and pay others. (they get their own salary plus the company profit.)
-- They are in commissioned work.
-- They invent something or write something and earn royalties.
-- They Manufacture a product.
-- Their parents were wealthy.
-- They are a part of a self serving club: Educators, Politicians, Anthropologists, etc.
-- They steal.
-- They have experience that others have a use for: Logistics Managers, Travel Guides, etc.
Once years ago, as I was having a severe fit of depression and self pity, I tried to identify why some people made lots of money:
-- They have a skill others want and not many have: Electricians, AC men, IT men, etc.
-- They have knowledge or special education not many have: Doctors , Lawyers, etc.
-- They are entrepreneurs that employ and pay others. (they get their own salary plus the company profit.)
-- They are in commissioned work.
-- They invent something or write something and earn royalties.
-- They Manufacture a product.
-- Their parents were wealthy.
-- They are a part of a self serving club: Educators, Politicians, Anthropologists, etc.
-- They steal.
-- They have experience that others have a use for: Logistics Managers, Travel Guides, etc.
Monday, November 30, 2015
DO WHAT YOU LOVE
LESSONS LEARNED
What would I do if I could do anything I want?
-- Build my Garage furniture, jigs
-- Build furniture, useful articles
-- Play "acoustic" jazz with really good musicians.
-- Do art: painting, ceramics, photography ...
-- Assemble things, like a training device.
-- Write VBA code that someone else besides me will find useful.
-- Write Python code to manipulate my stuff, interface with WORD and EXCEL documents
-- Use Office products in ways others are not (or can not) so the information they contain reaches the highest potential.
-- Travel to Paris, London, Italy, Germany. Maybe Spain, Sweden (where my Grandfather came from).
What would I do if I could do anything I want?
-- Build my Garage furniture, jigs
-- Build furniture, useful articles
-- Play "acoustic" jazz with really good musicians.
-- Do art: painting, ceramics, photography ...
-- Assemble things, like a training device.
-- Write VBA code that someone else besides me will find useful.
-- Write Python code to manipulate my stuff, interface with WORD and EXCEL documents
-- Use Office products in ways others are not (or can not) so the information they contain reaches the highest potential.
-- Travel to Paris, London, Italy, Germany. Maybe Spain, Sweden (where my Grandfather came from).
Saturday, November 28, 2015
DO THE JOB YOU ARE PAID FOR
LESSONS LEARNED
When I was working for Mr. Watts I started as a helper to Gary Bowles, an air conditioning installer. One day I was standing in the warehouse. Gary was crouched down working on something. Mr. Watts (the boss), Jerry (the supervisor) and I were watching Gary. Mr. Watts looked at Gary, he looked at me, looked at Gary, looked at me and said (with an acid voice) "Help Him!" Immediately I realized I was not doing the job I was hired to do: be a helper. That meant was I was supposed to look for ways to do that job, to look for ways to help. My job wasn't that I was supposed to wait around, idle, until I was told what to do.
Since then that very important lesson has served me well the rest of my life. Unlike most other people, if you look for some way to make yourself useful you will show yourself to be a valuable person.
When I was working for Mr. Watts I started as a helper to Gary Bowles, an air conditioning installer. One day I was standing in the warehouse. Gary was crouched down working on something. Mr. Watts (the boss), Jerry (the supervisor) and I were watching Gary. Mr. Watts looked at Gary, he looked at me, looked at Gary, looked at me and said (with an acid voice) "Help Him!" Immediately I realized I was not doing the job I was hired to do: be a helper. That meant was I was supposed to look for ways to do that job, to look for ways to help. My job wasn't that I was supposed to wait around, idle, until I was told what to do.
Since then that very important lesson has served me well the rest of my life. Unlike most other people, if you look for some way to make yourself useful you will show yourself to be a valuable person.
SPENDING TIME TO SAVE TIME
LESSONS LEARNED
Sometimes you can spend a lot of time doing a thing that on it's face seems wasteful, but will save much time and effort later. I have spent lots of time learning about Microsoft Office software and Visual Basic for Applications software. Many times the skills I have learned enabled to do my job faster and better later on. I spent two hours and saved eight -- and the work was of better quality. The skills also enabled me to do tasks that the others around me could not do. Just the understanding and software I developed to compare two different lists equipped me to finish an analysis in five minutes that would take another several hours to complete if they did it "by-hand". I have enabled myself to analyze items that would be too complicated or tedious or lengthy for others to do.
Sometimes you can spend a lot of time doing a thing that on it's face seems wasteful, but will save much time and effort later. I have spent lots of time learning about Microsoft Office software and Visual Basic for Applications software. Many times the skills I have learned enabled to do my job faster and better later on. I spent two hours and saved eight -- and the work was of better quality. The skills also enabled me to do tasks that the others around me could not do. Just the understanding and software I developed to compare two different lists equipped me to finish an analysis in five minutes that would take another several hours to complete if they did it "by-hand". I have enabled myself to analyze items that would be too complicated or tedious or lengthy for others to do.
Friday, November 27, 2015
YOU WILL DIE
CANCER
When I was sick Tania and Josh gave me a book in which to write my experiences with the cancer. Although I wrote some, I regret I did not write much. One of the biggest is the realization that you can eat right and exercise right but you can still get cancer. Another is that death is inevitable. Something like cancer can make you grasp the reality of it. I always knew I was going to die. Cancer brings the realization you can die tomorrow.
If I was to die immediately there would be events, relationships and situations I had left undone. Perhaps I would have to stand red-faced at an interrogation desk just on the other side of THE DOOR.
Being yet on this side of THE DOOR, however, begs me to think, "What events relationships and situations should I be engaging in now?"
As I am writing this it makes TV and movies seem less important.
When I was sick Tania and Josh gave me a book in which to write my experiences with the cancer. Although I wrote some, I regret I did not write much. One of the biggest is the realization that you can eat right and exercise right but you can still get cancer. Another is that death is inevitable. Something like cancer can make you grasp the reality of it. I always knew I was going to die. Cancer brings the realization you can die tomorrow.
If I was to die immediately there would be events, relationships and situations I had left undone. Perhaps I would have to stand red-faced at an interrogation desk just on the other side of THE DOOR.
Being yet on this side of THE DOOR, however, begs me to think, "What events relationships and situations should I be engaging in now?"
As I am writing this it makes TV and movies seem less important.
Thursday, November 26, 2015
GOOD BOYS
OBSERVATIONS
One thing I am thankful for is the boys that God has given me. Others seem to have received drug-ridden, drinking, philandering, excess-spending, non-working, lazy, foul-mouthed sorts -- but not me. God has given me men I am proud of
One thing I am thankful for is the boys that God has given me. Others seem to have received drug-ridden, drinking, philandering, excess-spending, non-working, lazy, foul-mouthed sorts -- but not me. God has given me men I am proud of
IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU, IT'S ABOUT HER
FAMILY
Liz sometimes undergoes a situation that it comes to the forefront of our existence, like writing the book or facing a challenge with her relationship to her family. When the boys were younger that happened with them too.
I sometimes wonder,
"Is my position and purpose on earth only to be a support to Liz and the boys? Is there no task that is assigned to me alone? Am I only a servant for this? Are Liz and the boys more important than I?"
At times like that I can apply Standard Answer Number One and think about what Jesus did. God clothed himself in flesh and came to earth to die for MY sin, raise himself up again, send the Holy Spirit and involve himself in MY life so much as I will let him.
What does the think of himself when he is doing this? Does he wish to be of more significance? I think he does want to be significant, but he allows us to make the final decision about how much significance we give him. Then I think, how CAN I be any different? His direct statement is, ". . .not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think. . ."(Rom 12:3).
And so what! What if that (care of my family) is the only purpose I have: "Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might . . ."(Ecc 9:10). So I should do it with all my might.
When It's all "over" for me, only the people last.
That is an important thought: Only the people last.
Liz sometimes undergoes a situation that it comes to the forefront of our existence, like writing the book or facing a challenge with her relationship to her family. When the boys were younger that happened with them too.
I sometimes wonder,
"Is my position and purpose on earth only to be a support to Liz and the boys? Is there no task that is assigned to me alone? Am I only a servant for this? Are Liz and the boys more important than I?"
At times like that I can apply Standard Answer Number One and think about what Jesus did. God clothed himself in flesh and came to earth to die for MY sin, raise himself up again, send the Holy Spirit and involve himself in MY life so much as I will let him.
What does the think of himself when he is doing this? Does he wish to be of more significance? I think he does want to be significant, but he allows us to make the final decision about how much significance we give him. Then I think, how CAN I be any different? His direct statement is, ". . .not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think. . ."(Rom 12:3).
And so what! What if that (care of my family) is the only purpose I have: "Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with your might . . ."(Ecc 9:10). So I should do it with all my might.
When It's all "over" for me, only the people last.
That is an important thought: Only the people last.
Wednesday, November 25, 2015
LOVE THE ONE YOU'RE WITH
MARRIAGE
After several months into my marriage I noticed that you have to adapt to the woman you live with. This woman -- the one you married -- is not the one you thought you were marrying. She resembles her, but now you see new dimensions of which you were not aware at the time of the courting and early days of marriage.
What you have to do is to adapt to this woman, because this is the one with whom you MUST "become one flesh" (Gen 2:24) (Mat 19:5) (Mk 10:8) (Eph 5:31). Maybe you would not have preferred her to be this way, but that's the way she is. You can learn to rearrange your interactions with her to accommodate her needs and desires. Indeed, you must do that.
You can fearfully think, "what if she does not think about who I actually am? What if she remains selfish? What if she refuses to stand on her own two feet?"
Sorry, that does not matter: you must do what is in YOUR power to do. You can act for yourself, you can not act for others. What others do is their responsibility before God.
You first exercise your responsibility to God, then you exercise your responsibilities to others.
You are not, after all, an Iron-Fisted Mug, neither are you a Push-Me-Over. If you are either: shame on you.
After several months into my marriage I noticed that you have to adapt to the woman you live with. This woman -- the one you married -- is not the one you thought you were marrying. She resembles her, but now you see new dimensions of which you were not aware at the time of the courting and early days of marriage.
What you have to do is to adapt to this woman, because this is the one with whom you MUST "become one flesh" (Gen 2:24) (Mat 19:5) (Mk 10:8) (Eph 5:31). Maybe you would not have preferred her to be this way, but that's the way she is. You can learn to rearrange your interactions with her to accommodate her needs and desires. Indeed, you must do that.
You can fearfully think, "what if she does not think about who I actually am? What if she remains selfish? What if she refuses to stand on her own two feet?"
Sorry, that does not matter: you must do what is in YOUR power to do. You can act for yourself, you can not act for others. What others do is their responsibility before God.
You first exercise your responsibility to God, then you exercise your responsibilities to others.
You are not, after all, an Iron-Fisted Mug, neither are you a Push-Me-Over. If you are either: shame on you.
Tuesday, November 24, 2015
I LOVED BAND
TEENAGER
I loved band. Band was my salvation. Band was an organization I could belong to that not a lot of other people could. In band I could do stuff others could not do. In my time I was the best drummer Mr Toland (the band director) had. And I wasn't proud about it; I would help the other drummers however I could. I didn't try to play ""King Of The Mountain"" with my position. Others could play trumpet and clarenet but they could not do the drums. Others could play drums, but not as well as I. 5/30/2012
I loved band. Band was my salvation. Band was an organization I could belong to that not a lot of other people could. In band I could do stuff others could not do. In my time I was the best drummer Mr Toland (the band director) had. And I wasn't proud about it; I would help the other drummers however I could. I didn't try to play ""King Of The Mountain"" with my position. Others could play trumpet and clarenet but they could not do the drums. Others could play drums, but not as well as I. 5/30/2012
Monday, November 23, 2015
I HATED HIGH SCHOOL
TEENAGER
High School was an unpleasent time of my life. Except for band I didn't fit into any special group. I wasn't one of the tough guys, the bullies. I wasn't a sports guy. (Although I did run on the crosscountry team -- ANYONE could get on the crosscountry team. I rhink I must have joined because I thought I ought to be in a sport; the "all boys do" sort of thing). I wasn't one of the smart people, nor was I a dunce. I wasn't one of the vocational people and I didn't feel I was college material.
I was girl-crazy. What a waste of time that was! I stayed girl-crazy to a point way too late in life. If I could only could have channeled that energy toward more productive activities and toward more worthy people.
5/30/2012
High School was an unpleasent time of my life. Except for band I didn't fit into any special group. I wasn't one of the tough guys, the bullies. I wasn't a sports guy. (Although I did run on the crosscountry team -- ANYONE could get on the crosscountry team. I rhink I must have joined because I thought I ought to be in a sport; the "all boys do" sort of thing). I wasn't one of the smart people, nor was I a dunce. I wasn't one of the vocational people and I didn't feel I was college material.
I was girl-crazy. What a waste of time that was! I stayed girl-crazy to a point way too late in life. If I could only could have channeled that energy toward more productive activities and toward more worthy people.
5/30/2012
BEING BULLIED
TEENAGER
For some reason I was easy to bully. I don't know why, I just seemed to draw it on myself. Maybe I didn't look like I would fight back. In fact, I would not have fought back because I didn't believe I should. I think the origin of that attitude would have been my Mother's teaching, it wouldn't have been my father's. (I don't remember any teaching from my father except, "don't join the armed forces", which, as you know, I did.)
I did not believe, and still don't believe, that brute force or intimidation should be used when some other way is possible.
One day I offended Billy Collins. I was a hallway monitor at the high school and made him walk around me the way I made everyone walk around me. My job was to make sure all walked around me on the proper side. Billy didn't want to do it. I said if he didn't I would report him. He told me he would see me outside after school, and he did. Billy met me and pushed me around right at the front entrance of the school. He tried to get me to swing at him so he could have a brawl, I suppose. I would not fight him. A whole crowd gathered around, boys and girls. Everyone watched, no one did anything except Billy Collins who punched me a couple of times. Billy and his tough boy friends were amused by the affair. I suppose the others were amused too.
I don't know how to think about this. Why should I even allow Billy a place in my memory?
As it was then, so it is now, that my deliverance comes not from strong-arming the Billy Collins's but by relying on the deliverance of the Lord. For I am indeed weak, but He (the Lord) is strong.
A couple years later I picked up Billy as he was hitch-hiking home. By this time he was in the Coat Guard and he was in uniform. He accepted the ride, but even then I don't think he was happy about it.
6/5/2012
For some reason I was easy to bully. I don't know why, I just seemed to draw it on myself. Maybe I didn't look like I would fight back. In fact, I would not have fought back because I didn't believe I should. I think the origin of that attitude would have been my Mother's teaching, it wouldn't have been my father's. (I don't remember any teaching from my father except, "don't join the armed forces", which, as you know, I did.)
I did not believe, and still don't believe, that brute force or intimidation should be used when some other way is possible.
One day I offended Billy Collins. I was a hallway monitor at the high school and made him walk around me the way I made everyone walk around me. My job was to make sure all walked around me on the proper side. Billy didn't want to do it. I said if he didn't I would report him. He told me he would see me outside after school, and he did. Billy met me and pushed me around right at the front entrance of the school. He tried to get me to swing at him so he could have a brawl, I suppose. I would not fight him. A whole crowd gathered around, boys and girls. Everyone watched, no one did anything except Billy Collins who punched me a couple of times. Billy and his tough boy friends were amused by the affair. I suppose the others were amused too.
I don't know how to think about this. Why should I even allow Billy a place in my memory?
As it was then, so it is now, that my deliverance comes not from strong-arming the Billy Collins's but by relying on the deliverance of the Lord. For I am indeed weak, but He (the Lord) is strong.
A couple years later I picked up Billy as he was hitch-hiking home. By this time he was in the Coat Guard and he was in uniform. He accepted the ride, but even then I don't think he was happy about it.
6/5/2012
Sunday, November 22, 2015
ZACCHAEUS
Most people think of Zacchaeus was a thief and a scoundrel because he was a Publican. Most thought the all Publicans (the tax collectors) treated people unfairly. Maybe not. Many sermons I've heard portray him as a scoundrel. The assumption is repeated multiple times so that it seems to become "true". No one seems to question it.
While many others may have been scoundrels, perhaps Zacchaeus was not. Is every IRS employee bad? Are all government contractors bad?
Zacchaeus said to Jesus he would pay back four-fold IF HE HAD CHEATED ANYONE (emphasis mine). But Maybe he didn't have to pay back four fold because he did not cheat or overcharge people. Maybe he, unlike some others , did not abuse his authority. Maybe Zacchaeus said that openly in front of the crowd knowing no one could honestly claim to have been cheated.
Just because a class of people are assumed to be bad does not mean every member of the class is bad.
While many others may have been scoundrels, perhaps Zacchaeus was not. Is every IRS employee bad? Are all government contractors bad?
Zacchaeus said to Jesus he would pay back four-fold IF HE HAD CHEATED ANYONE (emphasis mine). But Maybe he didn't have to pay back four fold because he did not cheat or overcharge people. Maybe he, unlike some others , did not abuse his authority. Maybe Zacchaeus said that openly in front of the crowd knowing no one could honestly claim to have been cheated.
Just because a class of people are assumed to be bad does not mean every member of the class is bad.
Saturday, November 21, 2015
WORKING WITH DAD
BOYHOOD
I never felt close to my father, neither did I ever see that he expressed any affection toward me. He did, however, let me hang out with him when he did anything. He never showed annoyence and he never chased me away. When I needed help, like the time I had taken the front end of my car all apart, he would help me. He would Stay as long as it took.
I never felt close to my father, neither did I ever see that he expressed any affection toward me. He did, however, let me hang out with him when he did anything. He never showed annoyence and he never chased me away. When I needed help, like the time I had taken the front end of my car all apart, he would help me. He would Stay as long as it took.
Friday, November 20, 2015
ABOUT CHILDREN
CHILDHOOD
I think children can understand more than adults think they can. I think I could grasp the general content of what my mother was talking about. I remember her talking on the phone and she kept saying "my husband". I remember what she said was not very flattering of him.
I think children can understand more than adults think they can. I think I could grasp the general content of what my mother was talking about. I remember her talking on the phone and she kept saying "my husband". I remember what she said was not very flattering of him.
Thursday, November 19, 2015
BABY CARRIAGE
CHILDHOOD
I remember being rolled uptown in a baby carriage by my mother. Mrs. Lameroux stopped my mother to talk to her. She wanted to look inside the carriage. She looked in at me and seemed to be a little surprised. I think I must have been a little older and wanted my mother to treat me like a baby and get wheeled in the carriage. Hence, when Mrs. Lameraux looked in, she saw someone a little older than she was expecting. Or maybe my memory goes back that far and I was actually a baby.
I remember being rolled uptown in a baby carriage by my mother. Mrs. Lameroux stopped my mother to talk to her. She wanted to look inside the carriage. She looked in at me and seemed to be a little surprised. I think I must have been a little older and wanted my mother to treat me like a baby and get wheeled in the carriage. Hence, when Mrs. Lameraux looked in, she saw someone a little older than she was expecting. Or maybe my memory goes back that far and I was actually a baby.
Wednesday, November 18, 2015
PAUL McKENNA
CHILDHOOD
Paul McKenna was the only other kid my age that lived in my neighborhood. There was something wrong with Paul. Sometimes he would stand, do a sort of running-in-place, shake his hands and make funny guttural noises. I don't really remember, but I don't think he was mentally all there. He had the potential for being the butt of all sorts of cruel jokes. But my Mother told me, "You need to be careful with people like, Paul. They can not help who or what they are. Even if other people are bad to him you can not be. You have to stand up for Paul if he needs it."
I hope I didn't hurt Paul, but being a kid I'll bet I did.
I'm sorry, Paul.
5/11/2012
Paul McKenna was the only other kid my age that lived in my neighborhood. There was something wrong with Paul. Sometimes he would stand, do a sort of running-in-place, shake his hands and make funny guttural noises. I don't really remember, but I don't think he was mentally all there. He had the potential for being the butt of all sorts of cruel jokes. But my Mother told me, "You need to be careful with people like, Paul. They can not help who or what they are. Even if other people are bad to him you can not be. You have to stand up for Paul if he needs it."
I hope I didn't hurt Paul, but being a kid I'll bet I did.
I'm sorry, Paul.
5/11/2012
Tuesday, November 17, 2015
BILLY NOREN
CHILDHOOD
When I lived at 65 South Street I was friends with a kid diagonally accross the road. His name was Billy Noren. My Mother didn't like him much, but I did. Anyway, he was the only kid around I had to play with. I was too young to play with my brothers. They, and their friends, did not want to play with me. Once I was annoying David my brother and one of the Webber boys by following them around. They saw a chance for freedom. They gave me one end of a rope and told me to hold the other end. They started pulling me. They approached and entered the thicket of a very large lilac bush. What fun! I followed them right along. I was just about to enter the thicket myself when the tension on the rope stopped. I started to pull on it myself; I was going to be the leader now. It didn't take long to figure out the boys at the other end had disappeared.
So Billy was around and I played with him.
5/11/2012
When I lived at 65 South Street I was friends with a kid diagonally accross the road. His name was Billy Noren. My Mother didn't like him much, but I did. Anyway, he was the only kid around I had to play with. I was too young to play with my brothers. They, and their friends, did not want to play with me. Once I was annoying David my brother and one of the Webber boys by following them around. They saw a chance for freedom. They gave me one end of a rope and told me to hold the other end. They started pulling me. They approached and entered the thicket of a very large lilac bush. What fun! I followed them right along. I was just about to enter the thicket myself when the tension on the rope stopped. I started to pull on it myself; I was going to be the leader now. It didn't take long to figure out the boys at the other end had disappeared.
So Billy was around and I played with him.
5/11/2012
Monday, November 16, 2015
BUSTER AND THE TOILET
[[ I ran across a bunch of old files that I had been putting together as part of an autobiography. I decided to post them here since it's easier than actually trying to think of something to write. Some have dates associated with them shown at the end of the items that had them. I don't remember what the date actually reflects; It doesn't appear to do with the actual date of authorship. ]]
CHILDHOOD
Buster, our mongrel dog, would come with us to our vacations to Maine. The house we rented on the island was on a wooded hill beside a river. This river was tidal, meaning that the water went toward the sea when the tide was going out, and went inland when the tide was coming in. Conditions were primitive for us and the neighbors. There was no running water. That meant that as well as using a hand pump to get water we also had to use either a privy outside, or a chemical toilet inside. Most used chemical toilets. When they got full the neighbors and we would empty them into the river when the tide was going out. Buster loved to swim. From time to time he would run down the hill and swim in the toilet effluent. That was bad enough. When he was through he would run back up the hill, stand close to anyone who was handy and shake himself, the way dogs do. We would watch him run up the hill knowing what he intended to do. We would point our finger at him and say (or yell), “Don't you do it Buster! Don't!” He didn't seem to understand. And he would do it.
5/17/2012
CHILDHOOD
Buster, our mongrel dog, would come with us to our vacations to Maine. The house we rented on the island was on a wooded hill beside a river. This river was tidal, meaning that the water went toward the sea when the tide was going out, and went inland when the tide was coming in. Conditions were primitive for us and the neighbors. There was no running water. That meant that as well as using a hand pump to get water we also had to use either a privy outside, or a chemical toilet inside. Most used chemical toilets. When they got full the neighbors and we would empty them into the river when the tide was going out. Buster loved to swim. From time to time he would run down the hill and swim in the toilet effluent. That was bad enough. When he was through he would run back up the hill, stand close to anyone who was handy and shake himself, the way dogs do. We would watch him run up the hill knowing what he intended to do. We would point our finger at him and say (or yell), “Don't you do it Buster! Don't!” He didn't seem to understand. And he would do it.
5/17/2012
Saturday, November 14, 2015
JOB APPLICATION WORDS
I wonder if any company could bear to write a job description for a position they want to fill without using the following words or phrases:
State of the art
World-class
Excellent
Exemplary
Highly engaged
Dedicated
Best possible
High quality.
While all this is nice, or even preferred, I'll bet the business world will keep on functioning when their job applicants lack most of these qualities.
State of the art
World-class
Excellent
Exemplary
Highly engaged
Dedicated
Best possible
High quality.
While all this is nice, or even preferred, I'll bet the business world will keep on functioning when their job applicants lack most of these qualities.
Sunday, November 8, 2015
BULLIES
There seem to be four groups of people: the Bullies, the Beautiful People (which would include the athletes), the Smart People, and All The Rest Of Us. If you take the fourth group, the rest of us, away, the only group that would suffer would be the Bullies because then they would have no one to bully.
The best thing that could happen would be the bullies would chew themselves up to oblivion.
Among some of the Beautiful People there may bully-like tendencies. Some, after all, are more beautiful or athletically skilled than the rest of us and want us to know and all about it.
Some Smart People really want all others to understand they are smarter and will attempt to demonstrate it.
Bullies are left-over Neanderthals who, because of their poorly developed and distorted sense of self-worth, feel they must force another to be under them.
The best thing that could happen would be the bullies would chew themselves up to oblivion.
Among some of the Beautiful People there may bully-like tendencies. Some, after all, are more beautiful or athletically skilled than the rest of us and want us to know and all about it.
Some Smart People really want all others to understand they are smarter and will attempt to demonstrate it.
Bullies are left-over Neanderthals who, because of their poorly developed and distorted sense of self-worth, feel they must force another to be under them.
Monday, October 26, 2015
USELESS OLD AGE
I recently have heard a statement similar to this: "The older should step aside to allow the younger to fill his vacancy". This suggests that older people mature into incompetence and raises several questions in my mind. Am I in someone's way? What process am I obstructing? Is there a specific age where I crystallize into this obstruction? At what age is the person of younger age being frustrated?
If, in the past, I have been in the way it would have been nice to have been told.
If I am now in the way it would be nice to be told.
If, in the past, I have been in the way it would have been nice to have been told.
If I am now in the way it would be nice to be told.
Monday, October 12, 2015
CHURCH MUSIC
Sometimes I find myself annoyed at church music which leads me to attempt the following definitions:
-- "Music leading": Singer(s) performing the exact melody (note the phrase "exact melody") expected of the people being lead.
-- "Solo": Lone singer singing melody with decorations as he/she feels inspired. There is no expectation of leading the listeners while this is done.
-- "Dixieland": An ensemble of 3 – 5 instruments simultaneously performing solo improvisations of the melody. Note: Dixieland will always at least once clearly state the melody with all instruments in harmony. This is done before the section using improvisation.
-- "Mess": A group of singers, perhaps mixed with instruments, all improvising a melody together.
-- "Awful Mess": A group of singers, perhaps mixed with instruments, all improvising a melody together some out of tune.
-- "Dreadfully Awful Mess": A group of singers, perhaps mixed with instruments, all improvising a melody together all out of tune.
-- "Music leading": Singer(s) performing the exact melody (note the phrase "exact melody") expected of the people being lead.
-- "Solo": Lone singer singing melody with decorations as he/she feels inspired. There is no expectation of leading the listeners while this is done.
-- "Dixieland": An ensemble of 3 – 5 instruments simultaneously performing solo improvisations of the melody. Note: Dixieland will always at least once clearly state the melody with all instruments in harmony. This is done before the section using improvisation.
-- "Mess": A group of singers, perhaps mixed with instruments, all improvising a melody together.
-- "Awful Mess": A group of singers, perhaps mixed with instruments, all improvising a melody together some out of tune.
-- "Dreadfully Awful Mess": A group of singers, perhaps mixed with instruments, all improvising a melody together all out of tune.
Tuesday, August 11, 2015
THERE IS EITHER MALE OR FEMALE
Here is a quote from Melissa Atkins Wardy as seen on Upworthy.com, "There is no 'boy side' or 'girl side' to childhood," she told Upworthy, noting gender stereotypes can hinder a child's development by limiting their experiences. "Why would we tell a kid they can't like cars or pirates or fairies or pink? . . ."
There is most definitely a "boy side" or "girl side" to childhood. I would never want my male child or grandchild to have any confusion about his sex (operative words, "sex" and "he"). It would be no big deal to me if he liked the color pink, or green for that matter.
I would never want my female child or grandchild to have any confusion about her sex (operative words, "sex" and "she"). Incidentally my granddaughters less than six years old do like to play with the toy cars. My older granddaughters actually drive real cars.
Physical hermaphrodites are extremely rare. They are the only ones where the "girl side" or "boy side" issue may be confusing.
Most children are either MALE or FEMALE. There is actually no shame in identifying yourself, or your child, as a MALE or FEMALE. Nearly all adults and children know the difference.
There is really no need to be afraid to tell a girl she is a girl, or a boy that he is a boy.
There is most definitely a "boy side" or "girl side" to childhood. I would never want my male child or grandchild to have any confusion about his sex (operative words, "sex" and "he"). It would be no big deal to me if he liked the color pink, or green for that matter.
I would never want my female child or grandchild to have any confusion about her sex (operative words, "sex" and "she"). Incidentally my granddaughters less than six years old do like to play with the toy cars. My older granddaughters actually drive real cars.
Physical hermaphrodites are extremely rare. They are the only ones where the "girl side" or "boy side" issue may be confusing.
Most children are either MALE or FEMALE. There is actually no shame in identifying yourself, or your child, as a MALE or FEMALE. Nearly all adults and children know the difference.
There is really no need to be afraid to tell a girl she is a girl, or a boy that he is a boy.
Monday, June 1, 2015
REPORT CARD
I saw three minutes of a PBS show where some rural Chinese parents had left their home to earn money to send back to the family. Upon their return the first thing they wanted to see was the report card of their child. The first thing they said was, "You were fifth in your class; why didn't you do better?" I immediately felt sad and turned off the show.
What should have been the first emotion? Should not it have been a gladness to see the child after being away? They wanted the child to succeed (I suppose) but was their child's success only a token for their own success? Was the only purpose of the child's existence to please the parents?
If I was the child I would have the deep feeling that no matter what I did it would never be good enough for my parents. I would never really succeed. Where do you suppose these feeling would lead?
I wonder what feelings the parents of the last place child had?
What should have been the first emotion? Should not it have been a gladness to see the child after being away? They wanted the child to succeed (I suppose) but was their child's success only a token for their own success? Was the only purpose of the child's existence to please the parents?
If I was the child I would have the deep feeling that no matter what I did it would never be good enough for my parents. I would never really succeed. Where do you suppose these feeling would lead?
I wonder what feelings the parents of the last place child had?
Friday, March 27, 2015
YOU ARE WHAT YOU THINK
Here is a quote from Sidney Madwed, an American author:
"Our subconscious minds have no sense of humor, play no jokes and cannot tell the difference between reality and an imagined thought or image. What we continually think about eventually will manifest in our lives."
To be fair I do not know the context of this quote, but what is it really saying?
Is the thinking that is going on in our subconscious - - that has no humor, cannot distinguish real and imagined, that may not know the difference between thought or image - - always going to manifest in our lives? Do we have no control?
Is the “subconscious” real, or an idea, a concept? If we are not aware of it, how do we know if it really exists - - just because some say that it does? What really happens before an idea can be sensed enough to express it - - to put it into words, or to draw a picture of it? And once we can express the idea then do we not have control of it?
I think once we can express it we have control over it. Therefore we can apply humor to it and tell the difference between it and reality. Unless we are mentally ill we always have control over our thoughts and actions. We have a large degree of control of what we know.
The “subconscious” is a blame-boy that’s too easy to use.
"Our subconscious minds have no sense of humor, play no jokes and cannot tell the difference between reality and an imagined thought or image. What we continually think about eventually will manifest in our lives."
To be fair I do not know the context of this quote, but what is it really saying?
Is the thinking that is going on in our subconscious - - that has no humor, cannot distinguish real and imagined, that may not know the difference between thought or image - - always going to manifest in our lives? Do we have no control?
Is the “subconscious” real, or an idea, a concept? If we are not aware of it, how do we know if it really exists - - just because some say that it does? What really happens before an idea can be sensed enough to express it - - to put it into words, or to draw a picture of it? And once we can express the idea then do we not have control of it?
I think once we can express it we have control over it. Therefore we can apply humor to it and tell the difference between it and reality. Unless we are mentally ill we always have control over our thoughts and actions. We have a large degree of control of what we know.
The “subconscious” is a blame-boy that’s too easy to use.
Tuesday, February 17, 2015
WARTIME
I was in the Vietnam War. I went for two reasons: 1) I always wanted to sail on a big ship and 2) I would have been drafted and I wanted to serve in the Navy rather than on land or air. I became a radioman on an Oiler, the USS Ponchatoula. Our job was to refuel other ships off the coast of Vietnam. These ships included aircraft carriers from which planes flew to bomb the Vietcong. We operated day and night. At night the planes would fly with their running lights on, dive down and drop the bombs. You could see the flashes and a few seconds hear the boom-boom-boom.
I liked being in the Navy and liked the job I did. I did not drop the bombs, but without my ship (and therefore me) the rest of the fleet could not conduct operations. I was not, and am not, sorry for my Navy time.
When I got out I never talked with anyone about my Navy time because it appeared that most people did not support the war or our government’s participation in it. It didn’t seem as if people believed this war accomplished what other wars have, like WWII, Afghanistan and Iraq. I felt I would have little respect from most people for having been part of the military in the Vietnam era.
I am proud of, and thankful for, our men and women in the military. I believe their work is keeping me and my family reasonably safe.
I liked being in the Navy and liked the job I did. I did not drop the bombs, but without my ship (and therefore me) the rest of the fleet could not conduct operations. I was not, and am not, sorry for my Navy time.
When I got out I never talked with anyone about my Navy time because it appeared that most people did not support the war or our government’s participation in it. It didn’t seem as if people believed this war accomplished what other wars have, like WWII, Afghanistan and Iraq. I felt I would have little respect from most people for having been part of the military in the Vietnam era.
I am proud of, and thankful for, our men and women in the military. I believe their work is keeping me and my family reasonably safe.
Thursday, February 12, 2015
REALIZE YOUR BLESSINGS
I am realizing I am a blessed man this morning.
- I have a faithful (and faith-filled), loving, loyal wife.
- I have productive, upright sons who are high quality family men.
- I have no trouble paying all my bills, and no reason to think I might not become unable.
- I have survived colon cancer and am presently in good health.
- I am benefiting from a good education and good life-long work experiences.
- I live in a fine neighborhood and have peaceful neighbors.
- I live in the USA and benefit from it’s history, laws and traditions.
- But fundamental to all: I know who Jesus Christ is and what he has done for me and the world, and know what he will yet do.
Friday, January 16, 2015
MAN-IN-THE-MIDDLE
If you will notice, the Bible describes many times where God wants to directly use someone or to directly speak to someone yet the person (or group of people) want someone else between them and God, or them and the task. You can see an early example of this in Exodus 4 where God wants Moses to speak to Pharaoh yet Moses begs off because he thinks he won’t be good enough for the task. So instead of what God really wants, Moses to speak directly to Pharaoh, we end up with a man-in-the-middle: Moses speaks to Aaron who speaks to Pharaoh. Notice how Moses resists God:
"Exo 4:10 And Moses said unto the LORD, O my Lord, I am not eloquent, neither heretofore, nor since thou hast spoken unto thy servant: but I am slow of speech, and of a slow tongue.
11 And the LORD said unto him, Who hath made man's mouth? or who maketh the dumb, or deaf, or the seeing, or the blind? have not I the LORD?
12 Now therefore go, and I will be with thy mouth, and teach thee what thou shalt say.
13 And he said, O my Lord, send, I pray thee, by the hand of him whom thou wilt send.
14 And the anger of the LORD was kindled against Moses, and he said, Is not Aaron the Levite thy brother? I know that he can speak well. And also, behold, he cometh forth to meet thee: and when he seeth thee, he will be glad in his heart.
15 And thou shalt speak unto him, and put words in his mouth: and I will be with thy mouth, and with his mouth, and will teach you what ye shall do.
16 And he shall be thy spokesman unto the people: and he shall be, even he shall be to thee instead of a mouth, and thou shalt be to him instead of God."
Another - - and sadder - - example is in Exodus 20 when God would have spoken directly to the people but they want Moses to hear what God has to say and come back and tell them. Instead of the people hearing directly from God they make Moses the man-in-the-middle.
"Exo 20:18 And all the people saw the thunderings, and the lightnings, and the noise of the trumpet, and the mountain smoking: and when the people saw it, they removed, and stood afar off.
19 And they said unto Moses, Speak thou with us, and we will hear: but let not God speak with us, lest we die."
This is what we tend to do in the Church; instead of listening to God ourselves - - through reading the Bible or prayer - - we put a man-in-the-middle. We depend on the priest or pastor or rabbi, or a certain denomination or sect. It seems easier to let someone else think for you than to think for yourself. Other people are important to listen to - - and we should listen to others - - but we should not depend on others to be the-man-in-the-middle between us and God.
"Exo 4:10 And Moses said unto the LORD, O my Lord, I am not eloquent, neither heretofore, nor since thou hast spoken unto thy servant: but I am slow of speech, and of a slow tongue.
11 And the LORD said unto him, Who hath made man's mouth? or who maketh the dumb, or deaf, or the seeing, or the blind? have not I the LORD?
12 Now therefore go, and I will be with thy mouth, and teach thee what thou shalt say.
13 And he said, O my Lord, send, I pray thee, by the hand of him whom thou wilt send.
14 And the anger of the LORD was kindled against Moses, and he said, Is not Aaron the Levite thy brother? I know that he can speak well. And also, behold, he cometh forth to meet thee: and when he seeth thee, he will be glad in his heart.
15 And thou shalt speak unto him, and put words in his mouth: and I will be with thy mouth, and with his mouth, and will teach you what ye shall do.
16 And he shall be thy spokesman unto the people: and he shall be, even he shall be to thee instead of a mouth, and thou shalt be to him instead of God."
Another - - and sadder - - example is in Exodus 20 when God would have spoken directly to the people but they want Moses to hear what God has to say and come back and tell them. Instead of the people hearing directly from God they make Moses the man-in-the-middle.
"Exo 20:18 And all the people saw the thunderings, and the lightnings, and the noise of the trumpet, and the mountain smoking: and when the people saw it, they removed, and stood afar off.
19 And they said unto Moses, Speak thou with us, and we will hear: but let not God speak with us, lest we die."
This is what we tend to do in the Church; instead of listening to God ourselves - - through reading the Bible or prayer - - we put a man-in-the-middle. We depend on the priest or pastor or rabbi, or a certain denomination or sect. It seems easier to let someone else think for you than to think for yourself. Other people are important to listen to - - and we should listen to others - - but we should not depend on others to be the-man-in-the-middle between us and God.
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